WHY MARRIAGE COUNSELLING

Marriage is the centre around which all other relationships of the couple are formed. The couples are the builders of the new family.

• Marriage Counselling deals with the pain in the marriage.
• Marriage Counselling helps in working at both the levels – at the individual level and at the marriage as a whole.
• Marriage Counselling helps in the couple to act so as to establish a balance in the relationship.
• Marriage Counselling helps in checking certain irrational assumptions that are detrimental to the marriage.
• Marriage Counselling helps the couples to act jointly in nurturing the relationship, thereby making a fast recovery.
• Marriage Counselling helps in gradually making sense to the couple instead of just the individual even when either the husband or the wife approaches.

FACTORS AFFECTING THE MARRIAGE

• Unclear expectations if the husband towards the wife and vice-versa
  • Couple’s mutual expectations when not conveyed properly or when not check for reality create disturbances in a marriage.
• Unclear expectations of the family of origin
  • However good the couple may be to each other but often the expectations of he family of origin affects the marriage. If these expectations are not dealt by the couple with unity and integrity, sometimes they create immense friction amongst the couple.
• Some immediate wants of the individuals
  • Immediate wants when not addressed lead to frustration and moving apart.
• Ambiguous roles as a husband or wife
  • Ambiguous roles of the husband and wife lead to a feeling of overdoing in the mind of either of them.
• Self Esteem of the husband and the wife
  • Low Self esteem is unconsciously made up by blaming, putting down, silent treatment and other form of unhealthy defense responses.
• Way of communication amongst the couple
  • Couples of today are so busy and unaware of how to communicate with each other and the result is that live only two like room partners.

ADDITIONAL SOURCES OF PAIN IN RELATIONSHIPS

After seeing hundreds of couples as a marriage and relationship counselor, I find people complaining of superficial reasons of disturbance in their relationships.

Some of these superficial reasons as mentioned by my clients are :

• No interest in each others life.
• Zero Affection towards each other.
• Display of Anger in every situation of conflict
• Indifferent attitude towards each others needs.
  
  

DISENGAGEMENT on the part of either or both of the couple pushes the relationship goes on a downward spiral. And then the outlet of disengagement is inform of indifference, loss of interest, frustration and display of anger.